I don't know why "like lower back pain" isn't a simile more frequently used in the language to describe the special uselessness that is both debilitating and slightly humiliating yet sharply painful. I could use that kind of phrase, ugh, frequently. "Like a kick in the balls" is frankly overused and doesn't really apply to the uselessness involved in lower back pain. No one would ask a man just kicked in the balls to help them lift a heavy item... Would they?
"Hey man. Word to the wise. Wear a cup to keep it up. Could you help me with this armoire?"
It's certainly possible.
But a dude with lower back pain asked to help with an armoire would either have to declare his uselessness or, more likely, try to help and make a total ass of himself with writhing and gritting of teeth, etc.
Actually, I actually do know why "like lower back pain" actually hasn't caught on (thank you otherwise worthless English degree!). The words "like lower back pain" just doesn't flow... buh BAH-buh buh buh... Maybe it just needs to be punched up a bit. Hm.
Like low back agony? buh BAH buh BAH-buh-buh... Better...
Like lumbar asunder? buh buh-BAH buh-BAH-buh... With the slant-rhyme? Too confusing. Lumbar? Lumber? Meh.
Like a slipped disk? buh buh BAH - BAH... Very strong, but the meaning is more vague...
Like a knot in my spine? Screw it.
Anyway, my back is friggin killing me, just getting worse and worse all day. Kinda focuses the mind on solving certain problems. Like how to use this pain positively... Hey, anything for our crappy language. We need a lower back pain related simile.
like a clamped tramp stamp
ReplyDelete(alternatively, like a twisted tramp stamp)
like a disk done slipped
like low back blowback
like the spine of a hunchbacked hooker
I don't know, man, I don't think you're going to find a pain simile involving the lower back that is as concise and universally understood as "like a kick in the balls". I wish you well on your quest.